Day 22-Something you wish you hadn't done in your life.

I know I've said it before, but I really am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, so that makes this a bit difficult to answer.

That being said, I think I can honestly say I wish I hadn't slacked off so much in high school.  I wish I had taken it more seriously, and focused more.  It's not that I spent high school parting the days away, I actually worked through high school.  It was more that I was not good in school, and since I was not good at it, little kept my interest.  Funny, I see now the exact opposite in my son.  He far exceeds his classmates and gets bored, and little keeps his interest.  It's interesting how two so opposite issues can have the same reaction.  Sorry, I've gotten a bit off track.

I wish I had paid more attention in high school.  I wish I hadn't seen it as such a social event, even though I don't recall being entirely social, so much as just wanting to figure out where I fit in.  I'm not sure I ever did figure that out either for all of my trying.  In fact it has taken my into my 30th year to start to figure out who I am, or at least who I want to be.  I can say for a fact I know who I don't want to be!

I really do believe everything happens for a reason, I think I had to experience high school the way I did, so that I can look back and know what to change when I do finally get back to school I can focus.  I know that part of getting through school for me is making sure that I choose something I am going to enjoy.  I am also old enough to know that no matter how much I like something there will always be aspects of what I do that I am not going to be fond of.  I have learned that for me it is best to focus on what I enjoy and find a way to "suck up" that which I am not fond of so that I can be more productive.

So really, as great as it would be to go back and get all A's in high school, if the truth be told, you could not pay me enough to go through that again!  The awkwardness and the constant fighting.  Never knowing who was your friend and who was your enemy from one day to the next.  Always changing to try to fit in with the current group, always following, never leading.  Nope, not for me!  I would much rather learn from my past and apply it to my future.  I have no desire to repeat high school or my mistakes from high school. 

That's why we live and we learn.  The important thing is to make sure we do learn.  I guess only time will tell if I have learned all I needed to know from my high school days.