Saturday, December 4, 2010

Credit Where Cerdit is Due

Much of who we are comes from how we are raised and who we are raise by.  My parents are two of the most amazing people I know.

My mom has always said I was an "easy" baby.  That makes me wonder when I stopped being "easy".  I was always a good kid.  I rarely got in trouble, and I did what I was told.  I didn't talk back (much) and I got fairly decent grades most of the time.  Even knowing all of this, I know I wasn't an "easy" "tween", teen or even adult (until maybe the last few weeks).  As I've said before, I am a very emotional person by nature much more than nurture. I'm sure this is part of what made me no longer "easy".

This is where the credit part comes in.  No matter how difficult I may have been to deal with at one time or another, for one reason or another, over the last 30 years, my parents have always been there for me.  They have always taken care of me in a way that no other two people in this world ever have or ever will.
I have often disagreed with the way my parents have handled different decisions I've made, or not made.  I have often been much too wrapped up in my own ideas of what should or shouldn't "be" to accept their knowledge as correct and in turn learned many lessons "the hard way".  In the past I routinely asked for advice only to turn around and do the exact opposite of all the advice I was given (and usually have it blow up in my face). 

It has taken me 30 years to realize that I don't have all the answers, I'm not always right, and mom and dad do know best 99.9% of the time, because they are the ones who have spent the last 30 years picking me up each time I have fallen.  They have done this without fail, without question, and without ever asking for anything in return.  I don't know many people who can say that no matter how bad things have gotten there was always someone to turn to.  Well I have two. 
It's time to give credit where credit is due, to my parent, who have always been there and I know will always be.  Thank you for raising me to understand the value of where good parenting beings, and for teaching me how to hopefully be a good parent to my son, so that some day he to will realize that parenting doesn't stop just because your child grows up, if anything, that's when the hardest part of parenting begins.  It's all so easy when you can make all the decisions for them, but then you realize they have a mind of their own....that's the hardest part.

I sent an e-mail to my dad the other day to thank him for getting Curt home for Christmas.  The e-mail read “Have I mentioned that you are the MOST AMAZING Daddy a daughter could ever ask for?! Thank you so much!  I love you!" and dad's reply was "Yes you have. You’re very welcome. I can’t wait to see Curt’s bald head. I also have a ticket for you for his graduation. I’ll get one for Gunnar too."  I can only hope that when he replied "Yes you have." in response to me asking if I had mentioned how amazing he is, that he truly realizes just how true that statement is.  

I don't know another father that would do what my dad has done for me, from the time I was 4 and he came into my life, my dad has done everything humanly possible to make sure that I would have the best life possible, from practicing pop flies with the girl who couldn't catch anything, to watching those awful softball games, to soccer (which wasn't so bad) to trying not to kill me while teaching me to drive, to countless school functions and even a private high school at my insistence for 2 years, to letting me work for him in his office after school for my first real job, to accompanying me to doctors appointments to flying cross country for the birth of my only child and even though he couldn't stay long after Gunnar was born, he was the one on the phone again from across the country instructing how to insure that I would make it through, and most recently, ensuring that my husband and "his bald head" would be home for Christmas.  There are many, many other things that make my dad amazing, these are just a few tidbits from the last 26 years.  I just hope he realizes just how amazing he really is.
My mom is just as amazing in her own right.  If it weren't for my mom's determination, inelegance, and well her spunk, my life could have been much different.  My mom was younger when she had me, but that didn't stop her from making sure that I was always loved and cared for and had everything I needed.  That has never changed from the time I was born, and I can guarantee you as long as she lives she will see to it that my family and I are always loved, cared for and always have what we need.  I can honestly say, that no matter how bad things have gotten, my mom has never left my side, literally and figuratively speaking.  We've spent countless hours "bonding" in just about every ER and Urgent Care in the greater Tucson area.  And although she got upset when I "ran away" as she like to refer to it, to New Jersey, after high school, she flew out to visit for my birthday.  She also made sure I was home for Christmas, and she was ready to get right on a plane when I got into my accident.  When I was in the hospital for 6+ weeks before Gunnar was born, she was there, every night, no matter how pissy I was.  When my blood pressure was so high a week after Gunnar was born, it was mom on the phone getting instruction from dad about how to make sure I didn't have a stroke.  And everyday in between, when I just need a shoulder to cry on or someone to ask advice of (even if I didn't previously use it) she is always there.
So to both my parents, I haven't said it nearly enough over the last 30 years, and I don't know that I'll ever be able to tell you enough over the next 30, so if by chance you come across this, I want you to know exactly how amazing you both are.  I love you more then you will ever know, and I appreciate all you have done and everything you will do in the future.  This doesn't begin to put into words my adoration for you both, but I know that each of you know my heart, so please take these words along with all my unspoken words, and know how much I love and appreciate you both.  Having two loving parents like you both is surly no small victory, it is much, much more than that.  I love you forever and always!

1 comment:

  1. We love you most Jen. Forever. xoxoxo

    Mom and Dad